Friday Five

Posted by: Shel Harrington 3 January, 2014 16 Comments

Shel Harrington's Friday FiveFridays are special. No time to read long, dragged out messages. We want quick. We want pithy. We want to head into the weekend with a smile on our face.

So to honor Fridays, I am starting this new feature – Friday Five. It may be informational, entertaining, inspirational, or some combination. It may be five related thoughts, or five random topics. But it will be short. And it will leave you with a new thought, idea, or smile on your face.

Up first, five of my favorite 2013 tips from various posts that will serve you well in 2014.

1. From 20 Things You Should Not Say to Your Spouse (Part 2): “You’re not doing it right.” Translation: “You’re not doing it the way I do it.” This is a fast-track to getting a personal invitation to do it the right way – as only you can do it.

2. From When to Dump the Date – 6 Red Flags: Red flag: You become their incentive to get fixed. Problems with alcohol, drugs, gambling, or any other type of addiction should be a dating deal-breaker. And yet, you’re in love. You hear yourself utter the ultimatum: “If you don’t get help for your problem with [fill in the vice], I’m going to stop dating you.” NO, NO, NO. You have that backwards. Flip that sentence right around: “I am going to stop dating you. I hope you get help with your problem.”

3. From 7 Behaviors Couples Should Avoid: Unnecessary contradictions. During spouse’s story about falling in front of a red door, you interrupt to point out the door was green. Well, that was helpful. Spouse carries on describing the tall man with big glasses who yanked the door open. You clarify that the glasses were actually goggles. Leaving your audience with a mental “So what?” If the correction isn’t significant or necessary, squelch it.

4. From Social Media and Marriage – The Good, the Bad, and Even Some Ugly. A negative – “catching up with” old flames. You tell yourself you’re going to see if they’re online – just to see what they’re up to. There they are! You tell yourself you’ll just say ‘hi.’ It’s okay to just check in and see how they’re doing, right? No. It’s not. Would it be oklay with you if you found out your spouse was ‘facebooking’ with a prior romantic partner? Most people don’t plan to have a physical or emotional affair – intimacy evolves one innocent step at a time. Don’t take the first step.

5. From 5 Ways to Stop the Fight Before it Starts: Pull a picture out of your pocket. A really cute one of the two of you together. Hold it up in front of your face. Now who can argue with that? Having such a picture in your pocket at all times will also serve as insurance – kind of like how it never rains when you actually have an umbrella with you!

 

WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO SEE IN THE FRIDAY FIVE?

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16 Comments

  • Shel, this was super! Even though I had to gulp over #3. I’d like to see you do more about the Red Flags of dating. I have two granddaughters, both lovely and single, and as you know, it’s a jungle out there in the dating world. Thanks for your wonderful blog.

    DiAne

    • Shel Harrington

      I’ll work on that, DiAne. I agree with you – it is a jungle out there for daters. My philosophy is if we date smarter we’ll marry smarter. My pet peeve is dating couples who get counseling to fix dating problems (when children aren’t involved) – I always thought one of the functions of dating was to weed out those who aren’t a good fit for a long-term commitment.

  • Great idea, Shel! I’m looking forward to this series! 🙂

  • What would I like to see? Well, your lists in 2013 were all beneficial and often humorous, so I’ll leave the list making to your creative and intellectual brain. I hope your knee is healing well.

    • Shel Harrington

      I do gravitate towards lists, don’t I? Well, hopefully with the Friday Five I’ll get outside my comfort zone and get a bit more random! The knee is coming along great – have about 5 more weeks of PT and I should be good to go. Thanks for your prayers and your follow-up, Jill!

  • I’m always up for a good laugh, on Friday or any other day! I’m sure whatever you post on this new feature will be great.

    • Shel Harrington

      Thanks, Maria! I was hoping to be able to use more cartoons, but the charge isn’t as nominal as I had hoped – I may have to develop my own cartoons!

  • great ideas-we all need to cherish our spouse!

  • Shel these are great articles & tips. Definitely sharing them w/ my Hubs. Taking the 5th, as to how many of these ring true to me. Ouch! 🙂

  • Love this new feature Shel! The “5 golden rings” worked great for the 12 days of Christmas (it was always my favorite part!) so I am sure that 5 of anything you collect will be wonderful.

  • Aww great list! LOL and I like the new Friday Five feature. So happy to be introduced to your blog. Can’t wait to read more. happy New Year Shel! xoxo

    • Shel Harrington

      Thanks, Marie – I’m so pleased you found me. I hope you’ll stop by often when you’re not to busy with the crazy/fun animal gang at lazymarie.com! Happy New Year!